| its really cold.
ahem...
i do not like green eggs and ham.
i do not like the place i am.
i do not like these little things.
i do not like this start of spring.
however
i do like the end of winter.
its as if i took out that splinter.
i do like upcoming events.
its just my luck to move apartments =)
hell and damnation hath no fury like a woman scorned?
more like a sorority with a vengeance. lol. oh greek politics and inner disputes.
New York City bound, just need to find an apartment, sublett the Philly one, and move on out and up.
time for a change beeeezies.
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| hello.
i havent written in here for a while. surprised its still around actually. all these new xanga features make my head hurt. i remember the good times when everything was a simple yes/no and there were no flashy ways to show things.
anyways,
till next time i stop by,
-Alex |
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mmk. thats it. |
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| In rebuttal, because of the insatiable need that you have to know that you are right and there is nothing to proove otherwise:
See, the funny thing is, I really have no idea what you are talking about. For if what you are trying to say is that I left you unjustly, the real problem is that, I never saw you as how you saw me. I believe you saw me as your sole confident, your best friend. That I belonged to you and vice versa. I, on the other hand, never saw you as more than a friend. Unfortunately, not a best friend, for I have people I already call my bests. I enjoyed your company while I could, and I hoped you did mine, but we changed into two separate people as we grew. You wanted something out of me that I saw as unfair and downright selfish. How is it that you can ask so much of me, while I have never even so much as asked you to give up something that makes you happy. You judge me unfairly and I've taken your judgement without fighting because I want you to know that I was listening. However, no matter how much we tried to talk our troubles through, nothing was ever solved. I don't mean to say our troubles are all your fault. I know that on both sides we needed to find a common ground. Unfortunately, you never seemed to be open to new possibilities. There is where I lay the majority of our issues. Also, I'm not one to depend so much on someone and I don't expect anyone to do the same to me. As long as you believe that I was one of the major factors that made your life, accusing me of "fucking your life up" as you eloquently put it, by taking my own path, is not only making me look as if I'm your mother, but also showing you as having no real authority in your own life. So before you attempt to accuse me of leaving you to fornicate with whoever to lift your self esteem, please realize that I never intended to hurt you, but I never thought I belonged to you, therefore the idea of "leaving you" never crossed my mind. And, without another thought, as long as you drag out this much tiresome and morbid dispute, I really have nothing more to say to you.
Sincerely and with regret,
Alex
PS. Please know that this is not a hate-filled notice. It is a my point of view and how I see what is occurring put down in words. After trying to listen, trying to understand, and being told I'm dense, I am blind to everything in return, here is what I think. Here is what I've been wanting to let you know as painless as possible. But, due to how this is drawing out longer than what I've expected, here it is, my ultimatum. So for now, leave me alone, stop trying to get a reaction out of me, pity and support from your friends about how horrible I was to you, because I'm done with it all. And this is my last time I'll spend trying to explain myself. |
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